There's something I have to get off my chest

 Sometimes my "family member" can really get under my skin.  Mostly because I think they do so on purpose, and yet don't give a damn how other people are treated.  I try very hard not to let this person know they've gotten the best of me.  As I have stated previously, I went drastic by moving across the country, so they aren't really in my life anymore.  Yet, because they're "family," it's hard not to hear about them.

I can't stand fake people.  You know the ones.  The ones that always seem to have an answer for everything just so they can justify their existence.  The thing is, they don't give a damn about who they hurt, or what they do - as long as they look good to the public eye.  It's like the worst of narcissism meets vain.  They're the ones you pray and pray that one day... JUST ONE day they realize what an inhuman being they've been.  But they never will live to see that day.  Nope.  They live in a world where you never mean anything to them, especially if you can't bring them any sort of gain.

This "family member," has oops-ed to the point of actually 'showing' the rest of the family that the issue we keep complaining about isn't about us.  You see, this "family member," has the rest of the family believing any issues we have are 'our problem.'  Well, they oops-ed.  They can't do the very thing it is they spend the last 10 years going to school for.  So the problem isn't us... It's them.  (Them used in a derogatory sense placing no gender towards the individual for privacy concerns.)  My spouse and I have had our own issues over the years.  As a unit under God, I would like to think we have become more self-aware of our actions and not afraid to change who we were to be better God-loving people.  This includes admitting our mistakes and forgiving those that hurt us.  (Ironic to the reason for this post, but let me continue.)  You see, this "family member" has admitted they cannot move on and so it's better to just ignore/delete/live without than to forgive and live life.  So they don't.  They don't partake in anything that may have 'us' in it.  And the rest of the family is now realizing this.

What gets me is how this person can just delete someone from their life and not give a damn in the world.  I mean, how does someone do that?   TO YOUR OWN FAMILY?!  I may be Christian.  I may need to take my problems and give them to God.  I may also need to forgive those that hurt me.  But I AM allowed to question any and all things and right now... sooo many questions!  I just can't fathom doing that to someone and being ok with myself.  (They're not OK, which is why they have the problems that they do.  But no one can tell them they are wrong now can they?)

Does anyone else have anyone like that in their lives?  I'm sure it's easier to just forget about them... but it's very difficult when it's close-knit like this.  For now I'll just keep it cryptic and hope that one day I can briefly understand.

Does anyone else....?

 Does anyone else feel they've ever been a victim of narcissism abuse?  I have a particular person in my life who I feel has been very abusive.  The thing is, I highly doubt they have the smarts to realize they're actually abusive.  While they are a person who remains active in my life, the good news is I have moved and I'm halfway across the country from where they are.  I realize I shouldn't be 'allowing' this person to have this continued control over me and the good news is they don't!  I feel though I have nowhere to go or no one to talk to about this to allow me to get over this.  So I'll post it here.

I have deleted all forms of social media for personal use.  When I have to, I also only use it for the incidents I'm needing to in a work-life fashion.  (I am a media director, so I cannot be completely deleted from it, but since I am 'logged in' via work I do not consider it mine.  Nor do I use that for any personal use.  By not giving myself that access, I have essentially removed myself from this person.  That doesn't mean I still don't get whiffs of info or tidbits from other areas of my life.  I have a much easier time though with that information than I did when I was fully online.  It just further proves my thoughts on their hypocrisy and ungratefulness that they're even able to wake up every morning as if they didn't do anything, ever.  (They even go so far as to be the victim in heated situations.)

So while I can't fully delete them from my life as easily as they do with their thoughts, I can and have distanced myself, removed myself from gaining any easily updated information, and generally don't ever ask or include them in any topic of conversation.  Again, while it has taken me time to get to this point, it has become easier to remove those 'times' from my memory.  I haven't completely done so, and they do bother me from time to time, which is why I have this.  So don't be surprised if I go about my blog on a happy note about beating some game when the next it is semi-depressing.  I'm generally not a depressing person, at the same time tho I do need some avenue to vent and scream, even if no one is listening.